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Writer's pictureRicky Kyles

Evangelicals & Gender Distinction

I see it all the time on social media with females who exhibit more testosterone than estrogen. Give me Pamu Kinney, Hillary Foytik, and Anita Ruth Hopper-type Sista Gurls all day, errday, and twice on Sundays.


Men and women are equal ontologically, but men and women are not equal in the roles they play in society, most especially in the church and in the home.


The Bible never commands men to submit other than to God Himself, while women were created, from Adam, by the way, to be the man’s helpmate and to submit to either their father or their husbands.


Mock me, ridicule me, and dismiss me all you want; all I have done in referencing the above propositions is explicitly recite what the Bible teaches without apology.


Sadly, our culture first has too many weak men, which makes it difficult for brothers like me, seeking to live in full accord and embrace a Biblical worldview, to breathe.


The Evangelical church is replete with weak-spined, soft men who would not dare decide an action without first gazing at their spouse for permission or approval.


Much of this in the AA community is due to over 70% of AA homes reared with only the mother in the home. This is an inside job, as God’s design for human flourishing was that the male lead in the home as a Servant-Leader.


Oh, by the way, you will not dismiss me with the feeble attempt that this understanding suppresses the dignity of women as my message is always exclusively directed to professing Christ-followers, and the Bible employs these directives to protect and honor women, not suppress them.


You may not be cognizant, but two of the greatest champions of women’s rights were none other than Jesus Christ. No surprise there, right? But did you know the Apostle Paul, when correctly understood, actually enhanced the status of women?


First Christ: During Christ’s earthly ministry, women were not allowed to be part of a Rabbi’s entourage, yet Luke records in chapter eight how Christ permitted women to be part of His traveling party, thus affording women an equal role in learning directly from the Master.


Now, onto the controversial and alleged misogynist Paul. In 1 Timothy 2, the Apostle “permits” women to “learn.” Only the careful student of history understands the import of such an easily glossed-over statement of fact. In Paul’s time, only affluent females were given the privilege of a formal education.


Females were thought to be beneath learning. Their job was to bear children and do the husband’s bidding. Yet, Paul, the alleged woman suppressor, permits female followers of Jesus Christ Apolostic to be actively engaged in learning. This is truly liberating and unheard of in antiquity.


No mature thinking professing Evangelicals ever expects the world to conform their thinking and actions to Godly expectations and principles so my angst is only and always directed to the visible Church only!!!


If the visible church spent more time in the Word than they did following after celebrity pastors like TD Jakes and Eddie Long, just to name two, but there are a myriad of others I can name like Beth Moore and Joyce Meyers, the professing Church would have a greater testimony to a waiting and watching world.


I have two daughters and one son. I remarked just a couple of Sundays ago in Sunday school that I want my girls to act distinctly as females, and I want my son to act distinctly as a male.


I am not delving into common, simplistic debates like whether only girls should play with dolls or the such. I see nothing unbiblical about girls playing competitive sports or boys engaging in arts like cooking. I am talking about leadership in the church and home and yet still include a caution even how the workplace is to be biblically governed. I commend Wayne Grudem and John Piper’s book Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, where they tackle the topic of how male headship should be honored and biblically practiced even in the workplace.


I am not necessarily advocating for a return to the Victorian Age, but our world, sadly including the professing Church, has definitely jumped the shark.


So let me close with this as food for thought: is your current disposition as a male or female what you exhibit if you knew Jesus Christ was coming to visit and tag along with you today?


Precisely, how you live out your gender, would it conform to the biblical ethos of Male and Female He created them.


Males? Are you leading from the front as Servant-Leaders? Taking responsibility for the governance of your home, or do you passively exist?


Females?: Do you delightfully come under the male headship of either your father, if single, or your husband, if married, or do you express sentiments like:


1) I don’t need no man; I got my own money

2) Marriage is a 50/50 proposition (that, by the way, is one of the most foolish and naive notions ever expressed in all of human history). How is the tie broken when disagreement arises in a 50/50 relationship? Do you take turns? Do you flip a coin? No, as the Bible screams, “Anything with two heads is a monster.”

3: Girl, I can do bad all by myself


The Bible was written with no consideration for your preferences or desires. None of us get a vote. Styles may change, but guess what? In every generation, God expects His creation to practice modesty, and modesty extends to more than just the clothes one wears.


I close by returning to my childhood and noticing how my mother comported herself both publicly and at home. There was never any doubt who was the leader in our home. That didn’t mean my mother had no voice; it just meant the roles were different.


The fact that my mother was not the leader didn’t negatively impact her dignity or worth. My brothers and I didn’t think less of a mother because our Dad called the shots; in fact, in some ways, we feared our mother more than our father.


Sadly, once the horse is out of the barn, you can get her back in, so it is probable the unbelieving world will continue to spiral downward; I get it.


My quandary is with you, the Christ follower. Why are you buying into this foolishness?


As always, let me know what you think. Until then, keep your hands to the plow and seek to serve for an Audience of One.


With fear & trembling

Ricky Kyles DEd.Min

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